Tuesday, May 9, 2017

Sister

For my precious girl

My dearest Emma,

     You're only two, but I know that you've noticed Mommy crying a lot lately. I know this because you always take my face in your sweet little hands and say "You okay, Mommy?" Lately, I've been telling you that I am crying because I am so happy.   It's true. I am so happy, but I am a little sad too, which I think is "normal" and okay, but I want you to know why.


     In a few days, you're going to become a Big Sister. I know that you won't remember that day or anything about it. You won't remember coming to the hospital, seeing your sister for the first time or holding and kissing her.  You won't remember the absolute joy that will be radiating from me and from Daddy.  It's okay that you won't remember. We'll tell you all about it many, many times.

Up until now, it's been me and you. I tell your daddy all the time that you're my "little bestie." We do everything together. We have gotten in a groove and routine and it works perfectly for us. You go to school a few days, then we have the afternoons to play. On the days you stay home we get to do whatever we want. It's the best life, getting to be with you everyday and watch you learn and grow.  


In a few days, our routine is going to change quite a bit. It won't be like that forever, but it will be different for a while.  This is the part that makes mommy a little sad. There will be times that we can't just go do whatever we want and times that we can't spend as much time together as before.  I know that you won't remember life before your sister arrived, but I will, and I'm going to miss it a little. However, I cannot wait for the day that you, me and your sister can explore and adventure together every day.

These past two years with you have been the best time of my life. I need you to know that.  I need you to know that I know why God picked you to be my girl, and for me to be your mama.  Every time I look at you I notice how much you look like your daddy, but when I watch you play and laugh and just live life, I see so much of myself. God knew that I needed a little girl who had her daddy's go-with-the-flow attitude but just enough of her mama's stubbornness and independence to make her an individual.  That's you kiddo. And you're the most perfect thing that I've ever laid eyes on.



As our lives are changing with the arrival of your little sister, I want you to remember that you are the one who made me a mama.  You have helped me learn patience that I never thought I possessed. You have helped me learn who I am and what I was put on Earth to do. You have helped me become better...a better wife, a better daughter, just better. Most importantly, you have taught me to love deeper than I ever dreamed of.

I will never forget these two years that we've had together, just the two of us. I will cherish them for the rest of my life.  Words can't describe how excited I am to watch you become a big sister. I know that you are going to be amazing at this new job of yours. I can't wait for all the fun that we're going to have together...just the three of us, and Daddy, when we let him join in.

You will always, always be my baby girl. Nothing will ever change that. My prayer for you, as you enter this time of transition, is that you and your sister will have a bond that is unshakeable. I pray that the two of you will be the best of friends. I pray that the two of you will never forget how important the other is to you. I pray that you will both always know that out of everything that Daddy and I have done, the two of you stand far and above as the proudest and best things.

Thank you for being my girl and for letting me be your mama.

I love you more than the sun, the moon, and all the stars in the sky.

~Mommy


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